Hey all you crazy lovers out there about to celebrate the shit out of the yearly day for love, this one’s for you. For all you couples, whether this is your first Valentine’s Day together or your 50th, go out there and love with all you got. Go get your haircut, your nails did and put some Sinatra on your playlist because this is your night and I want you to do it up right.
Valentine’s Day may be the biggest corporate heist of a holiday ever, but you know what, who cares, we celebrate the shit out of Cinco de Mayo and ain’t a one of us know what the hell happened in Mexico on May the fifth, but we do know how to say Un mas cerveza por favor. And I can promise none of you fools knows who the hell St. Patrick was, but that never stopped you from puttin’ on the green duds and drinking like a true Irishman.
What I am getting at is yes, we are supposed to tell our loved ones we love them everyday, and yes, flowers aren’t something that should only be bought once a year, but let’s just accept this day for what it is and just have fun. I know that millions of people don’t have Valentines to celebrate with this year, but that shouldn’t stop you from celebrating. Go find a mannequin and haul it Olive Garden for pete’s sake, and may I suggest the Tour of Italy and a nice glass of Malbec. Hell, I am coaching a 6 year old soccer game at 8 pm that night (please pray for me), but don’t think I ain’t stopping by some bar on the way home and buying the cutest couple there a free round. My point is this, celebrate it, keep the chain letter of love going, and be happy for those who have it today, because what you put out into the universe will come back to you, hopefully in the form of tall, dark and rich (and I ain’t talking about coffee).
Love is a great thing, the greatest of things and if you have a special person to take out, then by golly you had best do it. This is the day to put on the cute dress and hope to God the poor guy you call your fella was smart enough to make reservations at Red Lobster. And if he doesn’t and you get there and realize that it is a two hour wait, you head to Taco Bell and order up the $5 bag o burritos and you go home and have to greatest indoor picnic you had ever seen and savor the shit out of those burritos and love every minute of it. And who cares if the kids wake you up at 6 am with a stomach ache the next day, you be sure to put on some Boyz II Men and “Make love to you like you want me to” with that sweetie pie of yours until that crazy morning arrives.
If you have no idea what to do for that special someone, let me know, I will be more than happy to Cyrano de Bergerac (look it up) the best ideas for you, and I have plenty, and although none of them work for me, I’m quite certain they will work for you. You need me to text you some ideas, I’m in, but just not between the hour of 8-9pm, soccer game remember. If all else fails, just tell them you love them and give them a great big bear hug. You never know what tomorrow brings, and the last thing you want to do is wake up years from now and wish you would have said something. Oh, and come on guys, show a little effort, and for God sake, don’t wear a baseball cap.
We may not all have fun plans or special loved ones this year, but it doesn’t mean we can’t make sweet sweet love to a pint of delicious ice cream while watching You’ve Got Mail for the thousandth time, or be happy for those who did find their SHOP-GIRL. The point is we have to celebrate love when we can, because Lord knows we need a little love and understanding right now. We have to celebrate love because it really is the only thing that can drive us crazy and keep us sane all at the same time.
Go have fun, be part of something special with someone special. I am going to send more text messages of love than you can imagine on Friday. Hell, I may even send some love to a bunch of wrong numbers and call centers just to make sure someone feels special that day, but do something, even if it’s for a stranger at Starbucks, and don’t worry single people, we got this next year.
Love you all,